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4 Things You Can Say To Burst A Narcissist's Bubble Of Self Importance

4 Things You Can Say To Burst A Narcissist's Bubble Of Self Importance

Narcissists will persist with their toxic, controlling and manipulative behavior, hurting you and the people around you, unless you take a stand against them.

A narcissist is hard to counter because they know just how to manipulate people to support and agree with them. They are incredibly insecure and try to compensate for their insecurity by charming and drawing people in so that the narcissist can always rely on them to support them in their dysfunctional behavior. It may be hard if you try to counter their manipulative tactics, especially because they'll look to the people around them to back them up. But if you use these phrases and stand your ground, you'll succeed in stopping them and their toxic behavior in their tracks.

1. "You don't scare me"

A narcissist may try to make veiled threats or insinuate that if you don't accede to their demands or play along with their charades, things may go very badly for you. They may do all this while smiling at you the whole time, pretending to like you.

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It can be very intimidating, but if you stand your ground and tell them in no unclear terms that you will not allow them to scare you into submission, it can fluster them.

A narcissist also enjoys using your insecurities against you, and they may verbally attack you or take digs at you, bringing your flaws up every chance they get just to make you feel bad. When they see that you are unaffected, it makes them feel angry and even helpless that they are unable to get to you with their manipulative tactics. They move on quickly once they know they can't affect you.

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2. "Stop dodging the question"

And that's one way to call them out on their bulls***t. When you confront a narcissist about their toxic behavior, they'll find every way possible to avoid facing the music. They hate having to come face to face with the consequences, especially when they get caught, and they want nothing more than to escape a situation where they have to explain themselves.

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iStock

They're masters at dodging important questions by changing the topic which can be frustrating to deal with. They may call attention to something else completely irrelevant or find a way to turn the focus off them and onto you. You need point this out and ask them rather firmly and politely to stay on topic and deal with the questions you've asked them. Every time they try to throw you off or confuse you, remind them about what you were discussing and let them know that you won't be manipulated so easily.

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3. "I'm not buying it until you show me proof"

Compulsive lying and narcissism go hand in hand. It's quite easy for a narcissist to blur the lines between the truth and lies and to manipulate stories in their favor because they love to find ways to make people think they are wonderful and can do little or no wrong. They think nothing of lying to people about their accomplishments or achievements just to embellish themselves in their eyes. If you notice a narcissist attempting to distort the truth, don't hesitate to call them out on it.

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iStock

Ask them specifics, and become curious about the details. Refuse to believe the tall tales they weave until they provide concrete evidence that what they said did indeed happen. They may lie to win sympathy or to make someone else look bad, but once you show them that you're not ignorant enough to buy their lies, they're less likely to try to lie to you.

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iStock

4. "No"

Perhaps what encourages narcissists the most in their manipulative behavior is that people are often hesitant to refuse their requests or call them out on their behavior. Narcissists paint their behavior in an almost reasonable light that to try and stop them would make you seem like the unreasonable. However, you can break out of the control they try to exert over you by simply refusing them.

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Narcissists thrive on the power and influence they have over other people, and your "No" can irk them and unsettle them. It shatters their illusion that people are easily misled and are willing to do whatever they want them to. Narcissists think so little of other people that to have you demonstrate that you're not blind to their games and schemes can throw them completely off.

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iStock

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