A survey revealed that almost half of the mothers polled felt that their husbands were a bigger source of stress than their kids.
A survey by TODAY Moms revealed that mothers felt that their husbands were a bigger source of stress than their kids. The reason is simple. “A 7-year-old is going to be a 7-year-old. But a 35-year-old acting like a 7-year-old is more stressful, because they should know better,” said Deno Fleno, a working mom surveyed by TODAY. According to the survey, an average American mom rates her stress level 8.5 out of 10, and 46% of moms admitted that their husbands stressed them out more than their kids.
According to TODAY, the moms compared their spouses to "big kids", complaining that they weren't doing their fair share of domestic work and childcare. Three-quarters of moms with partners say they do most of the parenting and household duties. One in five moms says not having enough help from their spouse is a major source of daily stress. The 2013 survey also revealed that 72% of moms actually stress about how stressed they are and that 60% of the 7000 moms surveyed say that their biggest source of stress is the lack of time to do everything that needs to get done.
TODAY reports that some of the anonymous comments posted on their Mom Stress survey illustrate the frustration that many moms feel at their partners. “I am exhausted emotionally and physically when my husband comes home. He feels like another job,” says one comment. Another explains, “Even though I have a committed spouse, I still feel like all the pressure is on ME to get everything done. I work just as many hours as my husband does, but yet I do all the scheduling.” A third one says, “I feel like I am figuring out a lot about parenting on my own without the input of my husband. This stresses me out because when something goes wrong, it is all my fault.”
Hal Runkel, an Atlanta-area therapist, told TODAY that even the best of marriages is inherently stressful. “Marriage is a more difficult relationship than parenting," he said. “I don’t believe what wives really want most are husbands who are acquiescent and stress-free.” Dr. Janet Taylor, a New York psychiatrist, told TODAY that mom stress is a common problem. “Moms are acutely aware of the fact they do not have the time to take care of their own needs,” she said. “Before you’re a mom, you take that for granted,” she added, referring to hobbies and activities like exercising. “When you are a mom you just don’t have the time.”