Codie LaChelle McPhate praised the ideal situation of co-parenting her parents had been practicing with her and how their choice to be cordial after their divorce taught her about respect and compassion.
Making relationships work takes a lot of time and effort. It is even more of a challenge when it comes to marriage. When two people decide to get married they don't do it with the intention of heading to splitsville at any point in mind. But sometimes, things just don't work out. While the situation is best for the couple who may have fallen out of love, having kids complicates things. The kids especially take it hard when their parents separate. No matter what ended the marriage, it would be in the children's best interest to be cordial with each other. That way, they can still have a fulfilling relationship with both their parents.
One person shared the perfect example of a healthy relationship their parents shared even after 30 years of divorce and could serve as a good example for everyone. Codie LaChelle McPhate first shared the story about her dad's acts of kindness on Facebook. Sharing pictures of her dad mowing the lawn of her mom's house she had written in the post, later shared by Cafe Mom: "When my younger siblings questioned ‘Why is your dad mowing mom's lawn?’ I told them ‘Because, She needed help, and he knew she couldn’t get out here to do it, so he did.'" She then went on to praise the ideal situation of co-parenting her parents had been practicing with her.
"This is how lucky I am to have four parents who respect each other, and know that at the end of the day, the only thing that matters is showing your children (even ones that are 32 years old) how to treat people and how to love your family, no matter how it came together," McPhate stated. Further explaining how special the moment she captured was, she wrote, "My dad is with me in Texas on vacation. He doesn’t even live here where my mom lives." He took time off from his vacation to help his ex-wife out. But he wants everyone to know that "he's no saint" and what he did was "choose kindness whenever we can."
Talking about how they came to share such a healthy relationship, McPhate explained: "He said my mom and he decided when they were going through their divorce they would both choose to be adults and treat each other with respect and compassion, because no matter how their marriage ended, they both loved each other very much at one point, and that that love -- counts for something. That if they were going to raise their children to be good, kind people, they needed to be good kind people." She also clarified that her dad did not mow his ex-wife's lawn for any sort of recognition. He did it out of the goodness of his heart alone.
"I’m very fortunate to have such amazing parents," McPhate said and added, "I know my moms and dads would do anything for each other because we’re family. I’m very fortunate to have such amazing parents." Her life could have gone in a very different direction if her parents had not decided to be cordial and mature about the divorce. The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry states that children will do well if they know and are assured that their mother and father will still be their parents and remain involved with them even though they may be going their separate ways. Parents' ongoing commitment to the child's well-being is vital. They may have their own problems and emotions to sort through. But reassuring your kid, especially if they are very young, in what is a tumultuous time in their life as well is important.