A 26-year-old man found himself in a spot after his sister, who suffers from mental health issues, left her baby at his door.
Having a child is one thing, raising one is another. It needs to be an informed decision and should be handled by caregivers only when they are ready to be responsible for a child because a child deserves to be in a loving, caring home. A 26-year-old man found himself in quite a situation when his sister dropped off her 3-year-old baby at his house and left to a hospital to get treated for mental health issues. The man who had no idea, called child services, because he was not ready to take care of a child, has a full-time job and is also in school. He asked on Reddit's AITA section if what he did was wrong.
He wrote: I'm 26M, my sister is 28F. We're the only family we both have, neither of our parents are with us anymore and we have no aunts, uncles, or cousins. I'm single, so is my sister: she's a single mother of a 3 year old. Despite all of this, we're not particularly close. We live in the same city but I might see her once a year in passing.
To make a long and convoluted post short, last week she came to my house and offloaded her son to me. She said she had to go to the hospital for mental health and I was the only person who could help. I couldn't even protest, she didn't even come inside. She took him in the car seat, put him on my porch, rang the bell, and told me all of this as she's walking back to her car. She left no diapers, no supplies, no nothing, not even a word of when she'll be back.
He went on to write that he called child services and now is scared of his sister's reaction when she finds out what happened. He continued: It took me less than four hours to contact police and have child services involved. He was basically abandoned with me, or at least that was my thoughts. They took the child away and my sister is still in the hospital. I have no way of contacting her, nor has she tried to contact me. I can't imagine the hellstorm that's going to be unleashed when she's out.
I'm just not equipped to handle a kid. My home isn't child proof, I have no friends who could babysit for a stranger, even as a favor. I work full time, I'm in school. I couldn't think of any alternative besides getting child services involved. I feel like I let my sister down but first and foremost I believe she let her own child down. I don't know what's going to happen. Was I the a**hole?
While some Redditors were sympathetic and understood that this a difficult situation many called him out for not being there for his sister or the child. One Redditor wrote: YTA (You're the A**hole). she didn’t let her child down, she did the best thing for both of them which is going to the hospital for her mental health problems. It seems like she was in a crisis hence the short notice. You put the poor kid in child services. This will add even more stress. It’s also very telling that she came to you for help, clearly, she felt that family would at least help her. Everyone on here loves to say “not your problem” and other selfish things but really, zero decency and basic humanity here which is why I say YTA. You only had the kid for 4 hours before calling cops.
The man clarified his stance on the matter. He wrote: edit: just so there's more info, I wasn't even left the base the car seat latches into. Never mind I don't even have a car. I'll admit I could have asked a friend for help picking up children stuff but that doesn't address anything else.Child services is what its name implies, here where I live it's called FACS. They work with families in struggling times like this. I told them my sister's name, the hospital she's at, and they presumably are working with her to sort this out. They left contact information but they won't disclose any status to me because I'm not the parent. Even just the status of my sister, they weren't at liberty to say.I didn't "put the kid up for adoption" it doesn't work like that. I contacted this agency who is trained to help in situations like this, where living arrangements are difficult or impossible for a child. My best guess is they have him in a foster home for now until my sister's out. I don't know anything else beyond my best guess.And I can't just take time off work or school to care for a child 24/7 when agencies like the one I contacted can offload the work for me. It's been 8 days and no word on anything: if I took eight days off work with no telling when I could return, I might as well not return.