32-year-old, Joel Denny was taking care of his daughter, Macy, when a phone call changed their lives forever. Beajay Phillips, 25, a nurse and mother of Macy had attempted to end her life.
A heartbroken father opened up about the painful moment when he had to tell his little 3-year-old daughter that her mother had taken her own life. 32-year-old, Joel Denny was taking care of his daugter, Macy, when a phone call changed their lives. The resident of Brisbane, Queensland learned that his former partner, Beajay Phillips, 25, had tragically attempted to end her life on September 29. Speaking to Daily Mail Australia, Denny confessed that sharing the news with his daughter was the toughest thing he's ever had to do in his life.
According to the outlet, Phillips was a friendly, bubbly, and outgoing young mother and nurse who worked at an aged care facility. Despite splitting up, after being together for seven years, Denny and Phillips spoke to each other every day. Even on the day of her death, Denny had a conversation with her where she seemed fine. "I was on the phone with Beajay until probably about 11 or 11.30 that night. She seemed fine and was helping me put Macy to sleep," he said. During this time, Macy was living with Denny at his parent's place as she was sick and had been throwing up all night.
At around 2 am, she was sick again and that's when Denny received a call. Phillips' housemate informed him of the terrible news. "It was terrifying, it was not something you can prepare yourself to hear. I was speaking to her two hours earlier. And she was perfectly fine. I was just in shock," revealed Denny who immediately made his way to her house. After the paramedics appeared on the scene, they were able to resuscitate her and place her on life support. Explaining the horrors that the following week had in store, he said, "I've never experienced anything like that in my life. She went into full-body seizures, which was very difficult to see. She was breathing by herself and her heart and everything was working by itself but over the next couple of days she deteriorated."
Finally, the doctors pronounced her brain dead after running a series of tests and she was taken off life support on October 7. If that was not enough, Denny was faced with the task of delivering the tragic news to his toddler who was curious about her mother's absence. "My daughter started to ask questions like "where's mummy?" and stuff like that. I'd kind of just change the subject until I had further information. By the end of it I just couldn't live with the guilt of not telling her what was going on," revealed the distressed dad. Recalling the heartbreaking moment, he said, "'I took her to a quiet area and told her, and my mum helped me with that, and just explained it to her the best I could in her language. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life and was so heartbreaking. Being three she doesn't fully comprehend it.
'Where's mummy?' Devastated father opens up about the moment he had to tell their daughter, 3, she had taken her own life - and the heartbreaking way he let her say goodbye https://t.co/Zk9JZPjOa0— MSN Malaysia (@MSNMSIA) 15 October 2019
Denny initially wasn't sure if letting her daughter say goodbye to Phillips was the best idea or not, however, after speaking with the nurses and other healthcare experts, he came to a conclusion that he had to. "I don't think I could've lived with the guilt for the rest of my life of not giving her the opportunity to say goodbye," he expressed. Furthermore, he explained how Macy is still struggling to understand what's happening. "Her whole life has changed in the matter of three weeks. She's gone from seeing dad every second weekend to being with me full time. There's been a couple of nights she's woken up in screams - screaming out for her mother. That's been so heartbreaking, you try your best to be there for them but they don't want that," said Denny.
Dad forced to tell daughter her mum killed herself after she asked ‘where’s mummy?’ https://t.co/aSROCPeSqq— The Sun (@TheSun) 15 October 2019
"You can't prepare yourself for this, no one can. She was the most happy, outgoing person. Everyone has their issues and I would never expect her to not speak about it. We would always turn to each other in our darkest times," he added. Urging others to be kind to one another, he said that one never knows what the other person is going through, thus being kind is the least we can do. A family friend also helped them set up a GoFundMe to raise money for their expenses.